I'm fopped off.

Alas poor Fopp. It only opened two months ago in King's Lynn. *sigh*

Back t'internet for my music!

Barking

.F. our faithful doggy often barks at nasty scary animals on the TV*. Today we switched on the TV and the first thing that appeared was Gillian McKeith. .F. went barking bonkers. I always knew he had good taste.

* like kittens or frogs.

Genesis - Calling All Stations (Yikes!)

Ok, so let's look at another album. Being a bit of a fan of early Genesis, and a fan of a bit of later Genesis, I bought this dirt cheap despite all the negative comments made about it. I can afford 99 pence.

Genesis used to be a great prog-rock band. Then when Peter Gabriel left they tried to be a more poppy proggy band, and sometimes succeeded. Finally they stuck to pop, Phil Collins style, and some of that was rather fun. Then they disappeared, leaving Phil Collins to annoy the hell out of everyone and Mike to do his Mechanics all over Radio Two. 1991 saw a return with an album (We Can't Dance) with loads of yawn-worthy material, and two poppy hits. They really shouldn't have bothered, and Phil Collins left after a while. That was the end of that.

Six years later, and for some reason, Rutherford and Banks still wanted to be Genesis, so they got some generic singer called Ray Wilson to warble over some rather bland soft rock and released this worthless lump of shite.

OK, so that is a bit harsh, so let us look at what we have here. First, what an awful cover. So Invisible Touch is even more ghastly, but this scores nil points for effort.

As for the music, it starts off sounding like a bad version of post-waters Pink Floyd. Calling All Stations is a rather mundane song which is made worse by a repetitive drum sound banging on all through the track which really annoys me. At the end Ray tries to inject a bit of oomph into his singing but the track fades out as he starts to let rip. Perhaps he was getting a bit too interesting.

A rather bad start, but underneath all my niggles with this track there is a sign of some hope. If they used a more interesting sound, got rid of the nasty robotic drum, let Ray go for it, found a decent tune and ended it properly then I might have liked it a bit. But wait, things do look better. Congo with its ethnic flavour and quite a catchy chorus almost deserves another chance, but hey, I'm not that generous, and it does have another bloody fade out. Lazy sods. Shipwrecked is nice, almost moving, almost worth checking out. Almost. Then we get the first long track. I guess they were trying to attract the older prog-rock loving Genesis fan with length and keep the more modern pop loving fan happy with safe sounds. Alien Afternoon starts off rather dull, I am reaching for that cup of cocoa before bedtime, but they bung on a pleasant if rather muddy instrumental second half which kind of redeems the track, almost making me not notice that fade out. Lazy sods. Well, that's three tracks in a row with a tiny bit of promise. They then let themselves down with two slow plodding dull songs. I'm now very bored. And to be fair, I've listened to this three times now. Gah! I need slapping in the face with a wet herring.

So far so unGenesis. Nothing so far sounds anything like anything Genesis have released before. I know Invisible Touch sounds nothing like Foxtrot, but at least there was a progression through the albums inbetween. This could be any generic rock band. As such The Dividing Line is a pleasant surprise. Lots of real drumwork, the synths sound like Tony Bank's synths and there is an overall Genesissy sound. There is even a proper ending! Yey! Shame it isn't that exciting. Trouble is they then go back to the bland and dull generic soft rock pap for the next three songs, although Ray tries to give it some welly in There Must Be Some Other Way so I guess it deserves better than the great skip button of doom. Finally we get to One Man's Fool, another lengthy track which goes nowhere and ends the album with another fade out! They know how to irritate me.

It all seems so half-hearted. I'd rather they bring back Phil and those pop songs! At least I can get drunk and wobble my bits to them.

Next time I shall spend my 99 pence on another Girls Aloud single. At least they have fun.

More Maude

Someone has started a Maude Fealy blog. They've found some photos I haven't seen before, and some useful biog. info.

I'm pleased with getting this lovely picture of her.

Sleepy

After going to a wedding, building a large wooden frame for a bit of decking in the garden, and then having a good swim yesterday, I am now officially knackered. Back to work for a single day tomorrow, so I might get some sleep then.

Luckily .J. sent me a compilation CD containing lots of Grandmaster Gareth which has cheered me up and also this fab song.

Favourite site of today : oddmusic.com

Job Application

Dear Fenland Citizen,

I am applying for the obviously vacant post of proof-reader . . . . .




I now feel all itchy.

IM OUTTA YR LOOP

Forget lolcats and lolfruit. It's time to get programming in lolCode!

Alien

I moved from the Midlands over to the Fens about 7 years ago. It was a bit of a culture shock. The strange dialect, weird dress sense, odd customs : but the locals soon got used to me. I do like the plethora of farm shops and roadside veg stands, and upon seeing a sign for asparagus and strawberries I popped into one such local farm shop.

I found some strawberries but couldn't see any asparagus so I asked the woman behind the counter if they had any. "We've just sold the last bunch" said she, and then called to the back of the store "Can you get me some more asparagus".

A large bloke appeared behind me wielding a knife, looked at me, looked outside where it was now bucketing it down with rain, and then put on a small and hardly waterproof cap and marched outside. "He won't be long" said the woman.

During the wait for asparagus, I spotted some odd looking things by the till. Round purple balls with mutant green fleshy leaves. I asked what they were, fruit or veg. "They're mangosteens, try one, just pull off the green bit and bite it. They're lovely." I thought that due to the odd look of the strange fruit, I would buy them and try eating them in the privacy of my own home. So I bought four.

"Try one, just pull off the green bit and bite it. They're lovely," repeated the woman just as the bloke, now wet, marched back in. "You won't get fresher than that" he said dumping some fresh cut asparagus in the scales. The woman put my purchases in a bag and once again tried to get me to eat a mangosteen, "Try one, just pull off the green bit and bite it. They're lovely. Everyone who tries it says they're lovely".
"You won't get fresher than that" said the man putting the asparagus in the bag.
"Go on try one", said the woman handing me the bag.
"You won't get fresher than that" said the man.
"Just pull off the green bit and bite it. Everyone who tries it says they're lovely" said the woman, as I backed out of the store, thanking the man for his soggy efforts.
"You won't get fresher than that" replied the man.
"Try one, they're lovely" called the woman as I made a dash for the car.

Back at home I thought I would try one. I pulled of the green bit and took a small bite. Blergh!
I then cut into the fruit and discovered that it had a fleshy outside and a juicy white inner bit, which was the edible part. I wonder just how many people have tried the fruit in the shop according to her instructions, and got a mouthful of nasty tasting flesh. In fact according to the wikipedia entry for mangosteen, the outer flesh contains pigments that are an avid dye on skin, so there could be a few purple mouthed people around.

The inner bit tastes a bit like lychee and orange and is rather delicious. The fruit is also the current in-thing, so mangosteen juice will no doubt soon be replacing pomegranate juice.

There's a hole in my planet

Apparently there are mysterious holes in Mars. I wonder what is in them. Probably a layer of caramel.


(If you look at the enlargement of the last image on this page, you can see what looks like a thin surface over an abyss.)